personal, ramblings, thoughts

Jazz Bands and Pole Fitness

And here it happens again. After a lot of heated love-giving that had been going on around here, I completely neglected my relationship with my blog (and my only creative outlet for the time being) because I took it for granted and wanted to have some fun around. In fact, I neglected it almost as much as I have neglected myself.

Thinking about the past two and a half months puts me in a state of raw panic because I have absolutely no idea where all the 101,969 minutes went. Like seriously, no clue. Even my planner cannot keep up with the pace of the Earth spinning. I feel like there’s a cosmic conspiracy to speed up our revolution around the Sun because there has been so much $#%! going on around here that it feels kinda obliged to make more time pass by before the next catastrophe strikes. Or it just wants to see if the hideous Mexican wall will be visible from space. #whoknows

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personal, thoughts


you give yourself
wearing your heart on your sleeve,
a love that you pick
from your pockets like a thief;

where does it all go?
no love comes back you know, 

you turn empty slowly,
afraid of things, you can’t keep track,
knowing what you give freely
you most certainly will never get back; 

but every single time,
some part of you starts

maybe this time it will work
maybe this time they won’t leave me.

ramblings, thoughts, works of fiction

Your Asides (For You)

a·side (noun, singular)
A remark or passage by a character in a play that is intended to be heard by the audience, but unheard by the other characters in the play.

Unheard by you. In time of lies telling the sometimes-horrible truth is a revolutionary act, and something about you makes me rather weak in the knees than rebellious. I might not be brave enough to let the words roll off my tongue, but more importantly, I have no intent to keep trying to make you understand something as alien as feelings. Because even if I do, you still wouldn’t hear me, not my mumblings nor my intentions, but a diluted version of my words and actions.

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ramblings, thoughts

Random Matters of the Heart

“If you cannot get someone off your mind, it means that you are on their mind too.”

Numerous times on dozen occasions have I asked myself if this is true. Sometimes when I am sitting idly alone my mind wanders off to the strangest of places and people. On such moments, an awkward feeling is born inside of me that I find no suitable words to describe. I am well-aware that you can never miss a certain person but rather the memories you have with them, and yet I have a weird feeling of longing that I cannot shake off my back.

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